‘Register Now’ Pages

Computer Word Verification

GMail Word Verification

Mraqualyn, crystormer, moodship, joypruns; are just a few of the gems that pop-up in the word verification box on web sites.  Who is the person hired to come up with these words?  It amazes me that someone is out there making a salary off of developing odd-ball words.  Sometimes I think that these free sites like Gmail (seen above) force us to type in dumb shit as payment to use their free product:
“Ha!  Xavier, lets make them type in poowhistle in order to sign-up.”

On sites like Google, after you get it wrong a few times they have the balls to put a picture of a cripple next to the entry field (seen above).  I was already mentally crippled after failing to copy English letters.  My confidence did not need the image of a disabled person linking me to the audio version of the word.  And what do people in wheelchairs have to do with the audio version?  Hey Google, a little presumptuous, no?  I figure people in wheel chairs would clean house in this event.  They sit down all day, and I am assuming they spend a lot of time registering for various web sites.  That’s how I would spend my time.  They probably have like a .985 batting average when it comes to the word verification box.

On registration pages, after you type in the magic word, you are then forced to power scroll through a sixty page agreement and click ‘accept’.  Imagine if as soon as you click ‘accept’, a nude version Dennis Nedry’s screen saver in Jurassic Park locked up your screen permanently.  “Ah Ah Ah.  You didn’t say the magic word!”  You would be like, “Hold On, can I go back, what the fuck did I just accept here?”

Image Created by ChrisGaldi.com

Image Created by ChrisGaldi.com

This article was written by Hugh Honey. Vic Vinegar is now finished.


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